The clock is ticking. It’s the Bowl in a couple of days, then it’s Valentine’s. And there are absolutely, without question, going to be stations that don’t do anything for either of them. The Bowl, I guess, kind of maybe, I could sort of excuse missing. But it’s really about food and TV sports.
But Valentine’s? It’s kind of hard to miss that. But then, some stations missed Christmas…
And when I say “missed,” I mean no imaging or web graphics or contests or features or events or anything more compelling than an autopost from corporate about “(B Level actress) and her favorite Christmas memories.”
Hands down, the best promotion for the Bowl is being down by 99.7 DJX in Louisville.
And the best imaging is being done by Full Power Radio in Springfield, Massachusetts.
After Valentine’s, it’s St. Patrick’s Day. I will send you a pot o’ gold o’ St. Patrick’s ideas if you email me at [email protected] and tell me what Steve Martin’s real name (according to Steve Martin in Comedy Is Not Pretty) is.
And now on with the Dumpage:
Hot Chicks on The Internet
One of the stations has a “thing” that’s being sponsored by the Egg Council. Which reminded me of this little ghetto incubator we had in 4th grade, where we watched a chick slowly hatch over a few days. Remembering that ALL great promotions go back to 4th grade, what if the next time you have a decent grand prize, you get ten qualifiers, assign them each a numbered egg, webcam it, and the first egg to hatch wins the prize for the designated listener.
To make it more exciting, the remaining nine eggs and the listeners should be fed to a boa.
Word Association
There are certain terms that envisage happy times and great memories. “Field trip” is one such term. Who DIDN’T like going on field trips in school? One of the stations is prepping for their theme park meeting next week. My suggestion was workplace field trips. Grab an office, load them on a school bus and take them to the park for a day off. Again, who WOULDN’T want to skip work? “Ditch” is another great term too, by the way.
Win A Key That Could Start a Car
The “win a CD” promotion came together one day while I was on the phone with Carlos at Wild in San Francisco and holding on for dear life as Mickey Johnson wove through traffic in Birmingham, talking on HIS phone and trying to find a CD that had slid under his car seat.
Mike Cass at Mix in Vancouver, and when he was at Nova in Melbourne, you won a shoe that could start a car.
Hot in Ottawa did Dancing with the Cars. Submit a video of yourself dancing, the winner got a car, and her video was in a TV spot that ran during Dancing with the Stars.
Before I die… Win A Gerbil That Can Start a Car….
The Big Finish
Joe Mitchell at K-Hits in Sacramento flipped the script on a radio cliché and turned it into a home run feature: instead of IDing the first couple of notes of a song, ID the last couple of notes.
Dogs And Cats Living Together. Mass Hysteria.
K-Hits also, like many stations, did a pet adoption promotion called Wet Nose Wednesday. Susan Wright was thinking that for Valentine’s week, it might/could be fun to do the video of the available pet, but themed as a singles site video. THAT would be funny.
Great Moments in Science
From WIXX in Green Bay: Brenda Vanden Elsen was the first person to correctly guess the time it would take for a soda can explode in the elements outside of our studios today. She wins a stay at Landmark Resort in Door County! It took 1 hour and 20 minutes on our contest clock, by the way. 2,000 guesses rolled in, 17 of them were correct, but Brenda called it first (12 minutes in).
Mystery Box Tuesday
Sometimes it feels like there are three morning show features that everyone does. Roula and Ryan at KRBE in Houston do Mystery Box Tuesday. I’m not sure what I love more: the blindfold or “Prickly white boy hair.”
Reverse Cupid
A station has been able to lock down the services of an attorney and will, in fact, be giving away a divorce for Valentine’s. And there was joy down in Whoville!
In 2019, Mojo did the Divorce Diet that tracked and rewarded people’s weight fluctuations after getting separated. Here is a weigh-in.
I Want to Thank God & My Publicist, Melissa
An awards show idea from Dave Ryan: Will They Thank God? Just record acceptance speeches and on Monday morning, play them back. First, get a caller on the phone and ask them whether the winner will thank God or not. “Lisa, R. Kelly wins for best R&B album. Will he thank God?” Then play the clip. The studio will fill with howls of laughter as he says, “And for making my latest joint, ‘Piss on That Bitch,’ number one, I wanna thank Almighty God.”
DMV Makeovers
Ric and Scott at KZIA did this a few years ago. Few people are happy with their driver’s license photos, and once it’s taken, it’s yours for years. A station-to-remain-nameless has a beauty school that needs a promotion. What if you had students from the school set up outside the DMV or adjacent to it, and gave women showing up for their renewal a quick comb through, maybe some styling gel, some makeup touchups? The promo needs to have a quick legal tag that: station is not responsible for blinking, lazy eye, or other facial malfunctions.
There Is Never a Right Answer
For your Valentine’s list, one of the morning shows did the Guess Your Spouse’s Weight for dinner, tickets to Keith Urban, and a couples massage.
