Paige Nienaber’s Midweek Idea Dump – Guys and (Creepy) Dolls

(By Paige Nienaber, obviously) Welcome to the first Paige Nienaber Midweek Idea Dump, powered by CPR Promotional Fiber.

For the uninitiated, I consult stations on Marketing & Promotions which, in 2023, covers just about everything except tower maintenance. I worked in Promotions at stations in Portland, the Twin Cities, Charlotte, and San Francisco. At the latter, I was one of three brains in a seven-day project that had us launching Wild 107.7. 

I love to launch stations. You can either merge cautiously onto the freeway and immediately blend in in the traffic, or you can blast down the ramp going 80 and leaving the other stations in your rearview mirror. I launched Wild in Tampa, Wired in Saskatoon with a Christmas format in April, an all-marijuana format in Denver, a Music For Dogs format in Texas, an All-Chinese format with Kung Pao 100.5 in Norfolk, and, a couple of months ago, a strip club format called The Pole in Canada. These were bumper formats of 72 hours to get attention and some ears on the station when the real format was debuted.

I’ve written two books on Radio Promotions and do a weekly podcast called Three Radio Promotions In Three Minutes. Look for it where podcasts can be found, or in the Automotive Dept. at Sears. My mother said that I should thank God every day that I stumbled into a career that rewards an 8th-grade maturity level.

So, let’s get started, shall we?

Promotions With Character

We can’t get more than 4% of people to play our stupid games and I think that one of the answers to “why” is that the way sell our contests, our imaging, is sometimes really boring. Listen around. It all sounds the same. Dom Theodore uses the term “wallpaper”. And that’s what a lot of contest promos are. We’re doing this amazing flyaway to see an artist and the promo is a quick bullet point infomercial with all of the excitement of a 30-second Yeast Guard barter spot.

I love having characters in the imaging. Recurring people to sell our contest with some humor and personality, that also provide context and a premise.

Great campaigns have great spokespeople. What would Progressive be without Flo? Just another insurance company. Our spokespeople are people with great voices. And since we all share that genre of spokesperson, why wouldn’t you occasionally mix it up?

Jamz in Orlando had a character “security guard” who was deep underground in sub-sector z, and guarding the prize vault. I modeled him on the old dude guarding the hallway in “Men In Black.” Occasionally the talent would take the elevator down to get some tickets or other prizes and he’d ask about how everything was up on the surface. “That internet thing ever take off?”

They also had the Berglunds. If you lived in Orlando, you knew the family. Don and Dorothy, with their kids Tim and Debby, would RV down from Minnesota. They drove slowly and were confounded by toll plazas. The Berglunds only popped up a couple of times a year, but when they did, you knew it was going to be special.

And one of their promos won an Addy.

FLY in Albany had Tammy The Ticket Intern who was a perky college student who was spending her summer vacay earning college credits by managing their huge inventory of tickets. Her character evolved and she returned to college a jaded, angry shell of her former self.

Mix in Canton had a litigious dentist attacking their “Win $1000 In Halloween Candy!” contest.

DJX in Louisville had a crazy cat lady named Eustis K. Ungerman as the voice of their “Win A Thousand Dollars In Ceramic Cats….Or The Cash Equivalent” group contest… and pulled the highest numbers in Alpha by being different and having some actual fun with it.

Dreddy D was a Jamaican pool boy that the owner’s daughter was helping get a green card and he was the voice of their summer umbrella “SPF 104.3.” (Summer Prize Fun) He had more Facebook friends than some of the airstaff.

We all work under constrictions and corporate policies, but no one is going to smack you down for being creative.

As Marshall McLuhan said, “It’s not the message but how you deliver it.

And now, on to the ideas.

A Candy Bracket

Go on Facebook and post, “Sophia Turner’s post-break-up fashion style has heads turning!”

And then go on Facebook and ask, “What was your FAVORITE candy to get on Halloween when you were a kid?”

Zactly.

Brackets are basically social media but with a voting mechanism. As is being done by Y94 in Fargo.

It’s Back

The $10,000 Pumpkin Drop is back at 97.5 K-Rock. Don’t dismiss this. It doesn’t have to be rocket science. 

Get a pumpkin. Hollow it out. Fill it with numbered balls. Award the balls to listeners. On the morning of the 31st drop it off the roof of your building. Award a Thanksgiving turkey to the listener whose ball was closest to a target on the ground.

Creepy Dolls

93Q in Syracuse is the first station to do something with creepy dolls and a gallery for Halloween. They’ve got a nice bunch of prizing too.

Petarazzi

I Googled this. Except for some fancy pet food stores and groomers, no one has done this. 

In the beginning, there was Baby Idol. And it was good. And stations got two years’ worth of hits in 72 hours. And joy rang across the land. 

This “submit a pic and tell all your friends to vote” has been done as Office Hottie, Baby Bumps, Backstage *sses, Hot Popo, Baby Gaga, any number of Hot Mom promotions, and even Mangled Mouth (for dental surgery).

This would basically be a Pet Costume Contest but with a genre. And Pet Costume Contests kill online. 

• Music Stars
• TV and Film
• Athletes

Submit. And encourage your friends and family to go and vote.

Paige Nienaber insults/consults more than 100 radio station on Fun ‘N Games (Marketing & Promotions). Find him at CPR Promotions.